possibly sean preston spears federline mathers' Journal [entries|friends|calendar] possibly sean preston spears federline mathers [ website | BECAUSE BABIES CAN'T TYPE ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[19 Sep 2005|06:33pm] [ mood | grumpy ] brad garrett from everybody loves raymond dedicated an award to me and moms, and they just named a smoothie after me called "the Preston Smoothie and it consists of only fat-free frozen yogurt, strawberries and mangoes" because i will probably grow up to be a little fruity. i get the connection, imbeciles. and somehow every variation of my aim screen name is already taken because people are true freaks and as soon as came into the world a bunch of fourteen year old bitches went and registered them up see i have not been out the womb a week yet and already my career is better than daddyfederline ( goo goo family time ) 4 | post comment | disclaimer

[18 Sep 2005|08:39pm] i am sean preston michael london spears federline mathers. moms hasn't come up with a name yet so until then that's what i go by. i was born four days ago. moms lived off that there caffeine drinks and them orange snack food things and doctors said that if she kept doing that shit she would effect me, her fetus, in some way. little did she know it effected my brain development. i hold more intelligence than either of my six parents ever will and this journal is the outlet for myself until i acquire speaking skills and maybe less impaired vision. moms gained sixty five pounds carrying me and i'm around six pounds, i hope when i reach the age where i take the blame for everything she does not point to my former residence and tell me it is my fault her body is no longer a wonderland. for now her big milk machines make up for any future damage she may do to me dating irish english guys and letting dads #2 give me my first cigarette. dads #1 keeps promising to teach me how to fire a gun i haven't got the hang of it yet but again i can't move much yet so someone should fill him in on that point. dads #2 keeps talking about weeds but they kill flowers so i don't know why he gets a pornographic look on his face when he mentions it. moms keeps lip syncing to me. it's not very comforting thus why i continue to cry. just wait until i get my voice. goo gaggidity. you will wish i'd still be just crying y'all 3 | post comment | disclaimer

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